Thursday, March 30, 2006

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Looking for a wife.....


Just relised the other day that I am on top of everthing and I can. Have a wife, Looking for someone that wants to be a wife. I thought I just mite put it out there. For so long I felt that I could not be the provider. The part that the man should be so for once I really can. Looking for someone that can belive in me, and share a dream....
Not just a Mother-daughter-like-for-comfort-and-compassion hugger or just my dreams but our dreams.....Is there anyone out there?????

Monday, March 20, 2006



Strange dreams

My house looks like an old womens house the dust is everywere and there is not a clean spot any were I tell myself that I don't care that its only a landing pad I can't seem to shake this I don't really no what it is am tring to shake but I can't seem to shake it..
My life dosen't suck or dose it I don't seem to no any more which way to turn I still can't beleave that my mother is dead it seems so sereal sometimes I pick up the phone thinking I will ask her something I don't no I will be thinking I wonder how long we had that for and I think I will just ask mom and I can't. Sometimes I can't understand it sucks Knowing that you are really alone that its all up to you and no one else.
Its not like its something new I have always done it alone but I always felt that there was this little blanket... Well that blanket was just ripped off of me and sometimes it gets rather cold. I have these strange dreams and there not nice there more like vision, vision of you in your worst state there like flash backs. Sometimes I will be awake and they just pop into my head sometimes I will be sleeping and I awake and start gasping for my air... Last night I had one of thoughs awake but sleeping dreams when I thought I was a wake but really I was sleeping and trying to wake up something was wrong something did not feel right I fear that someone was in my space and it was not welcome I could not move and I thought to myself if I could only just move my leg things would be alright... I couldn't move not even a wiggle fear was running all through me then I realised that if I were in real danger the dogs would have been going crazy then I manage to move and awoke just to be all alone once again alone....

Found this on updates blog so I thought.



The following was forwarded to me and was asked to be passed forth so I decided to pass it on through my blog since it is a very important issue and most of us women are prime targets at one point or other in our life span.I would like you to go through it once atleast.
A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interviewed on
what they look for in a potential victim and here is the data collected:

1) The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle.
They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun,
braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to
go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2) The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who's clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around specifically to cut clothing.

3) They also look for women on their cell phone, searching through
their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and
can be easily overpowered.

4) Men are most likely to attack &rape in the early morning,
between 5:00a.m. and 8:30a.m.

5) The number one place women are abducted from/attacked is grocery
store parking lots. Number two is office parking lots/garages.
number three is public restrooms.

6) The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and
quickly move her to another location where they don't have to worry
about getting caught.

7) Only 2% said they carried weapons because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape with a weapon is 15-20 years.

8) If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn't
worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9) These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you're not worth it.

10) Several defense mechanisms he taught us are: If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or
stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: "I can't believe it is so cold out here ", "we're in for a bad winter." Now you've seen their face and could identify them in a line-up; you lose appeal as a target.

11) If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell STOP or STAY BACK ! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they'd leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

12) If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

13) If someone grabs you, you can't beat them with strength but you can by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind,pinch the attacker either under the arm (between the elbow and armpit)oR in the upper inner thigh VERY VERY HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands - the guy needed stitches.
Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it hurts.

14) After the initial hit, always GO for the GROIN. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy's parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you'll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he's out of there.

15) When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

16) Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don't dismiss it, go with your instincts!!!
You may feel a little silly at the time, but you'd feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.


Ok most of you may agree or disagree with some of the points.But it's always worth a read.I would personally use my umbrella,shout and if need be punch in the groin.Make as much noise as possible.Most of the time your attacker runs away.And we are not just talking about rape here,girls.So many have to face public abuse and the likes.Whenever someone tries to invade your privacy without your consent,in any way,let them know that they are in the wrong.Do not be quiet.It will make them think twice before they act funny with some other innocent girl.
Self defence classes really help.